empty

My dad asked me why I didn't go see star wars with a friend, and I responded without thinking. Because I don't have any friends.. That's how I feel. I feel so distanced from everyone I was ever close to.. I feel like I'm drowning. I'm not connected to anyone anymore.. and I feel so fundamentally different from the rest of the world. I can't connect with others, and I'm so terribly alone. Is it possible to drown without water? The world around me is becoming more and more distorted and confusing, and I'm dying. Not in the traditional sense, where your heart stops beating and brain functions cease. I'm dying in a different way.. emotionally. I've been struggling for so long and now I'm just giving up.. I've always struggled to hold onto hope, to the possibility of something better.
I can't anymore.