I feel lost a lot.
A lot of the time, it feels like things are going good, I feel like I can maybe handle life. Then it just crashes, and I don't know why. I take my medicine. The same self-loathing thoughts keep playing in my head, they've been there all my life. I want them to go away and I don't know why I am the way I am. I don't know why I react to things the way I do, why I can't handle interaction with other people. I hate being alone and I love it. There's certain people that I like to be around.. but when faced with the option of being around a majority of the population I feel that I just want to close my door and be left alone.
I'm so tired, but it never really slows down, just keeps dragging on.